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Jonathan Matei's avatar

This feels cinematic right away. The imagery is rich and steady, and that last line builds a quiet tension that makes me want to keep reading.

What is the boy about to realize he has lost?

E. H. Lau's avatar

Ah, that was neat!

As a fellow writer, I could feel the tribute that you wanted to give to the characters and stories that you had to discard to build the final version of your book!

(At least, that's what I think you were going for.)

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